Beat Down
What do you do when you are blindsided by life? When your world is thrown into chaos and your days are filled with phone calls, appointments and putting out fires? When your heart is broken beyond belief and you simply can't focus on getting through the day?
The circumstances are not relevant here- it could be anything. What is relevant is how to pick up the pieces and try to carry on as a homeschooler.
Putting the kids in school would seem a good idea at this point, since you are struggling to figure out what's for dinner or how you are going to get to the store. But the more you think about it, you realize that really won't solve anything. It won't heal your heart or restore order to your life.
So what do you do?
You.just.stop.
"Kids, we aren't going to do school for a while, and I'm not sure when we will pick back up."
This has been my school year. We have gotten back into a very pared down routine, but I have witnessed the following:
The 6 yr old figured out how to read and can read some simple books. She has learned to knit. She asks deep, philosophical and theological questions. She has learned to fix herself a simple breakfast and can clean up after herself, make her bed and take care of her laundry and her room. She loves to make my bed all by herself, and I let her even though it's not perfect. It's good enough.
The 9 yr old is reading through the Chronicles of Narnia. He makes elaborate Lego creations. He likes to write and illustrate stories. He also has learned to knit. He likes to play card and board games. He does his own laundry and can do quite a lot of chores around the house.
The 12 yr old has really gotten into knitting (explaining the younger two siblings' interest in it!). She has become an independent learner in almost all her subjects (earlier than I usually encourage it- but circumstances dictated it). She cleans the kitchen without being asked and she and her little sister are in charge of their room and their own laundry. She has figured out that she can usually finish her school work before lunch, and then has the day free to knit, write letters to her pen pals, listen to music or read.
The 15 yr old is completely on his own, and finished up history early. So, I gave him a stack of random books and he is devouring them. He is working on a beautiful mural in his room- a mountain scene reminiscent of Rivendell from the Lord of the Rings. He is writing a science fiction novel. He re-purposes trash into art. He figured out how to work the sewing machine. He even tried knitting! He is planning a flower garden and some renovations to his room.
The kids play games together, and are watching a variety of educational videos along with the entire run of Hogan's Heroes. (The 15 yr old looked up all the real life characters that are mentioned in the show and read up on them). They have learned to rely on each other more, and on me less.
This school year, from an outsider's perspective, might look like a total wash. It even seemed that way to me at first. But as I have had to take care of other things, I have watched them learn so much!
You may be in a similar place in life. I'm sorry that you are. It's just so wearying. I feel so weak and insufficient at times. I don't even have the energy to encourage you- I wrote this more as a reminder to myself what HAS actually happened here, lest I forget. And I'm sure I have forgotten things or don't even know all of the things they have learned to do or think about.
I guess someday, things will be better- more "normal." I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, nor do I have much hope-yet.
Life can beat you down. And sometimes people will join in and kick you while you are down (that, as well, has happened to me recently). But I do have the Lord- the one sure thing in my life. Sometimes things are so big, so beyond our control or comprehension, we can easily give it right back to God. That's where I'm at. I'm sorry if you are too. Just know you are not alone.
Peace.
The circumstances are not relevant here- it could be anything. What is relevant is how to pick up the pieces and try to carry on as a homeschooler.
Putting the kids in school would seem a good idea at this point, since you are struggling to figure out what's for dinner or how you are going to get to the store. But the more you think about it, you realize that really won't solve anything. It won't heal your heart or restore order to your life.
So what do you do?
You.just.stop.
"Kids, we aren't going to do school for a while, and I'm not sure when we will pick back up."
This has been my school year. We have gotten back into a very pared down routine, but I have witnessed the following:
The 6 yr old figured out how to read and can read some simple books. She has learned to knit. She asks deep, philosophical and theological questions. She has learned to fix herself a simple breakfast and can clean up after herself, make her bed and take care of her laundry and her room. She loves to make my bed all by herself, and I let her even though it's not perfect. It's good enough.
The 9 yr old is reading through the Chronicles of Narnia. He makes elaborate Lego creations. He likes to write and illustrate stories. He also has learned to knit. He likes to play card and board games. He does his own laundry and can do quite a lot of chores around the house.
The 12 yr old has really gotten into knitting (explaining the younger two siblings' interest in it!). She has become an independent learner in almost all her subjects (earlier than I usually encourage it- but circumstances dictated it). She cleans the kitchen without being asked and she and her little sister are in charge of their room and their own laundry. She has figured out that she can usually finish her school work before lunch, and then has the day free to knit, write letters to her pen pals, listen to music or read.
The 15 yr old is completely on his own, and finished up history early. So, I gave him a stack of random books and he is devouring them. He is working on a beautiful mural in his room- a mountain scene reminiscent of Rivendell from the Lord of the Rings. He is writing a science fiction novel. He re-purposes trash into art. He figured out how to work the sewing machine. He even tried knitting! He is planning a flower garden and some renovations to his room.
The kids play games together, and are watching a variety of educational videos along with the entire run of Hogan's Heroes. (The 15 yr old looked up all the real life characters that are mentioned in the show and read up on them). They have learned to rely on each other more, and on me less.
This school year, from an outsider's perspective, might look like a total wash. It even seemed that way to me at first. But as I have had to take care of other things, I have watched them learn so much!
You may be in a similar place in life. I'm sorry that you are. It's just so wearying. I feel so weak and insufficient at times. I don't even have the energy to encourage you- I wrote this more as a reminder to myself what HAS actually happened here, lest I forget. And I'm sure I have forgotten things or don't even know all of the things they have learned to do or think about.
I guess someday, things will be better- more "normal." I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, nor do I have much hope-yet.
Life can beat you down. And sometimes people will join in and kick you while you are down (that, as well, has happened to me recently). But I do have the Lord- the one sure thing in my life. Sometimes things are so big, so beyond our control or comprehension, we can easily give it right back to God. That's where I'm at. I'm sorry if you are too. Just know you are not alone.
Peace.
Hugs to you from a fellow homeschooling mom. Also, thanks for this post.
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