The Pre-School Homeschooler
So now you are in the midst of home education and you have little ones under foot while you are trying to do school with the older ones. It's not easy. In fact, some days it seems impossible. And you are wondering how in the world can your older kids get a decent education when you have little ones to care for?
It can be done, no doubt about it. This is one way it could look and there are others, I am sure. But one way some moms are dealing with this situation is to put those little ones in pre-school. It seems the perfect solution! You can get all your school work done with the older ones without all those pesky interruptions from the younger ones. Your all important school day will flow along seamlessly with the needy and messy younger ones out of the way.
But is that how life really works? Is that what we home school moms are called to do? Do we put some kids out of our way so we can get done what we want to get done with the other kids?
What are we saying to our kids if we do this? The older kids may get a sense of self importance about themselves, that their schooling trumps mom's other duties, and they may be just a bit more important than the younger ones. The younger ones may feel left out of things at home and wonder why they are going to school when their older siblings aren't. They may have fun, but they will certainly miss their mom and their family.
Homeschooling is not a neat and tidy endeavor. Neither is motherhood. And we are called to do both, at the same time. But what is happening when we put our younger children in day care so we can educate our older kids? We have put homeschooling on a pedestal. We have put it above motherhood, above our duty to all of our kids. It is flirting dangerously close to being made an idol. And what could make the Evil one happier than for us to make something good and honorable and right an idol?
Since I do not have special needs kids or kids with chronic illness, I am only speaking to the moms with healthy "normal" kids. But I have been there. I am in my 14th year of home educating. This is the first year I have not been pregnant (I do not like being pregnant), nursing a baby or changing diapers or potty training. I have 7 kids. I know all about toddlers and how demanding and messy and needy they are. I also know that they need me. They do not need to be out of my way. They need me.
Moms, our duty is to all of our children, all of the time. The little ones may be having a blast in pre-school, but putting some out of the way, on a regular basis, with strangers, is to neglect our duty and to give it to someone else. We committed ourselves to educate our kids, to go against the grain of our culture. Why would we turn right around and put our precious babies in the hands of others so we could "get our schooling done"? We miss the entire point of motherhood if we do. For the home educator, motherhood and homeschooling are basically the same thing.
When our kids see us juggling many tasks, they learn that life is like that. When they see us nursing a baby or taking a moment to placate a toddler, all while reading aloud or working on some math, they see a picture of being all things to all people. That mom loves us all, and none of us is more important than the other, and that toddlers and babies are not in the way, but a part of the family. A family that is learning together. A family that sticks together, no matter how difficult.
No, the older kids' education will not look like their public school counterparts. It wasn't meant to. Yes, there will be interruptions, and the older ones will become adept at dealing with them as they come. There will be many days when you get little schooling done, but lessons will have been learned nonetheless.
Mom, it's not about you. It's not about school. It's about raising your children to fear and love the Lord. It's about living in this world but not being of this world. It's about leaning on the Lord in all things. It's about dying to self and serving others.
Resist the temptation to get your younger kids out of the way. They are supposed to be in your way! Have someone come over once in a while to help out. Accept meals when they are offered. Ask your husband for help. But stick it out. You will look back on those years and you will not say "I wish I had stuck my babies in pre-school so I could have done a better job." But if you do put them out of the way, you may look back with regret over the lost years you could have had with those babies.
Babies are babies for a blink of an eye. Hold them close. This stage of motherhood will pass, all too quickly. And you will be wondering where it went.
You can do this, mom.
It can be done, no doubt about it. This is one way it could look and there are others, I am sure. But one way some moms are dealing with this situation is to put those little ones in pre-school. It seems the perfect solution! You can get all your school work done with the older ones without all those pesky interruptions from the younger ones. Your all important school day will flow along seamlessly with the needy and messy younger ones out of the way.
But is that how life really works? Is that what we home school moms are called to do? Do we put some kids out of our way so we can get done what we want to get done with the other kids?
What are we saying to our kids if we do this? The older kids may get a sense of self importance about themselves, that their schooling trumps mom's other duties, and they may be just a bit more important than the younger ones. The younger ones may feel left out of things at home and wonder why they are going to school when their older siblings aren't. They may have fun, but they will certainly miss their mom and their family.
Homeschooling is not a neat and tidy endeavor. Neither is motherhood. And we are called to do both, at the same time. But what is happening when we put our younger children in day care so we can educate our older kids? We have put homeschooling on a pedestal. We have put it above motherhood, above our duty to all of our kids. It is flirting dangerously close to being made an idol. And what could make the Evil one happier than for us to make something good and honorable and right an idol?
Since I do not have special needs kids or kids with chronic illness, I am only speaking to the moms with healthy "normal" kids. But I have been there. I am in my 14th year of home educating. This is the first year I have not been pregnant (I do not like being pregnant), nursing a baby or changing diapers or potty training. I have 7 kids. I know all about toddlers and how demanding and messy and needy they are. I also know that they need me. They do not need to be out of my way. They need me.
Moms, our duty is to all of our children, all of the time. The little ones may be having a blast in pre-school, but putting some out of the way, on a regular basis, with strangers, is to neglect our duty and to give it to someone else. We committed ourselves to educate our kids, to go against the grain of our culture. Why would we turn right around and put our precious babies in the hands of others so we could "get our schooling done"? We miss the entire point of motherhood if we do. For the home educator, motherhood and homeschooling are basically the same thing.
When our kids see us juggling many tasks, they learn that life is like that. When they see us nursing a baby or taking a moment to placate a toddler, all while reading aloud or working on some math, they see a picture of being all things to all people. That mom loves us all, and none of us is more important than the other, and that toddlers and babies are not in the way, but a part of the family. A family that is learning together. A family that sticks together, no matter how difficult.
No, the older kids' education will not look like their public school counterparts. It wasn't meant to. Yes, there will be interruptions, and the older ones will become adept at dealing with them as they come. There will be many days when you get little schooling done, but lessons will have been learned nonetheless.
Mom, it's not about you. It's not about school. It's about raising your children to fear and love the Lord. It's about living in this world but not being of this world. It's about leaning on the Lord in all things. It's about dying to self and serving others.
Resist the temptation to get your younger kids out of the way. They are supposed to be in your way! Have someone come over once in a while to help out. Accept meals when they are offered. Ask your husband for help. But stick it out. You will look back on those years and you will not say "I wish I had stuck my babies in pre-school so I could have done a better job." But if you do put them out of the way, you may look back with regret over the lost years you could have had with those babies.
Babies are babies for a blink of an eye. Hold them close. This stage of motherhood will pass, all too quickly. And you will be wondering where it went.
You can do this, mom.
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