More Than a Pretty Face
I've gotten to the point in my life where I no longer worry about being pretty or attractive. I'm content to be out of pain, able to do the physical activities I want to do, and have a lot of energy. Who needs pretty at my age? But lately the 2 and 5 year old have looked me in the eye and said "Mommy, you look pretty!"
I'm also at the age where I am not about to argue with someone who says something nice to me. Over the years, when the older kids were young, they, too would say something like that, and I didn't argue then, either. But I was vain then, and inside, I disagreed. I have never voiced out loud my opinions of how I think I look, at least in front of the kids. It wasn't really a conscious choice, I wasn't out to protect my girls' self esteem, I just didn't. Maybe because my mom never did either, I don't know.
What makes our children say that we are pretty? What makes them arrive at that conclusion? They say it with sincerity and conviction, as if there could be no other way of looking at Mommy. Kids see things in such simple terms sometimes. I think kids look at their mom and they see way more than a pretty face.
When I lie in bed with the 2 year old and read her stories before her nap, she hears the voice she heard everyday while in the womb. She smells the familiar smell of her Mommy; my hair, remnants of what was cooked for lunch, and my own unique smell. As she nuzzles up close to me, she can feel my softness, and its comfort. As she sucks her fingers, I imagine she somehow remembers the taste of nursing. And she sees my face; she sees me smile at her, not just with my mouth, but with my eyes.
With all her senses, she knows I love her and that she is safe with me. As babies experience their world through all their senses, she can experience her mother's love for her through all her senses as well. And in that, she sees beauty. Beauty that is way more skin deep; beauty that's in the heart. Kids have away of seeing right through us adults, seeing all the way inside. They look past our sinfulness and selfishness, past the dark parts of our soul, and see God's image stamped on our heart. Sure, she thinks my face is pretty, but I know that she sees an inner attractiveness that she is unable to articulate at her age.
Wouldn't it be nice if we adults looked at people and searched for their inner value and beauty, that image of God that is stamped on our hearts, before deciding what we think of them? For all their inexperience and ignorance, children have such a beautiful way of seeing the world.
And next time your child (or any child) says you are pretty, say thanks.
I'm also at the age where I am not about to argue with someone who says something nice to me. Over the years, when the older kids were young, they, too would say something like that, and I didn't argue then, either. But I was vain then, and inside, I disagreed. I have never voiced out loud my opinions of how I think I look, at least in front of the kids. It wasn't really a conscious choice, I wasn't out to protect my girls' self esteem, I just didn't. Maybe because my mom never did either, I don't know.
What makes our children say that we are pretty? What makes them arrive at that conclusion? They say it with sincerity and conviction, as if there could be no other way of looking at Mommy. Kids see things in such simple terms sometimes. I think kids look at their mom and they see way more than a pretty face.
When I lie in bed with the 2 year old and read her stories before her nap, she hears the voice she heard everyday while in the womb. She smells the familiar smell of her Mommy; my hair, remnants of what was cooked for lunch, and my own unique smell. As she nuzzles up close to me, she can feel my softness, and its comfort. As she sucks her fingers, I imagine she somehow remembers the taste of nursing. And she sees my face; she sees me smile at her, not just with my mouth, but with my eyes.
With all her senses, she knows I love her and that she is safe with me. As babies experience their world through all their senses, she can experience her mother's love for her through all her senses as well. And in that, she sees beauty. Beauty that is way more skin deep; beauty that's in the heart. Kids have away of seeing right through us adults, seeing all the way inside. They look past our sinfulness and selfishness, past the dark parts of our soul, and see God's image stamped on our heart. Sure, she thinks my face is pretty, but I know that she sees an inner attractiveness that she is unable to articulate at her age.
Wouldn't it be nice if we adults looked at people and searched for their inner value and beauty, that image of God that is stamped on our hearts, before deciding what we think of them? For all their inexperience and ignorance, children have such a beautiful way of seeing the world.
And next time your child (or any child) says you are pretty, say thanks.
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